How To Tell If You’re Meant To Stay Single

“If you enjoy living alone and spending time by yourself, you would prefer not to have to negotiate for what you want with a partner, or your real love is your career, then perhaps you are better off being single,” Tina B. Tessina, aka Dr. Romance, psychotherapist and author of Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences, tells Bustle. “Whether being single is positive or negative depends on the personality,” she says. If you love flying under the radar, doing your own thang, then you’re well-suited for this lifestyle. “A person who enjoys solitude will do well,” she says. “So will an assertive social person who can initiate the contact he or she needs and maintain social connections. “A depressed, shy, passive person, or someone with low self-esteem can get into trouble,” she says.

So if you’re single and loving it, that rules — but be sure to have a good network in place, she says. “If a person has a social circle and is active, being single is not a problem; in fact, it can be healthier than living with someone in a dysfunctional relationship,” she says. “An active person’s alone time is cherished and feels basically good.” This only works, though, if you have non-alone time too. “A person who is isolated can withdraw into depression, paranoia and bad habits,” she says. “An isolated person has no reality check in the feedback of friends and family.” As long as this doesn’t include you, enjoy your single life!

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