What causes abuse and rape, are abusers

“Controlling relationships” are not OK and are not the norm, as young people are often led to believe. A complete paradigm shift needs to occur across our society in what is acceptable in relationships. Violence is never OK; controlling the behaviour and outside contacts of a partner is never OK. Our organisation is sponsoring the books that go with that programme and I recommend them to any parent to read and give to their children to read.

That said, I have also become increasingly aware of the behaviour of young women in a social setting – I have had a wedding venue for many years. There have been many occasions where I have had to ban drunken young women from another drink, or half-carry them to a waiting cab, or pick them up as they fall again on the dance floor while their “mates” stand laughing.

I have a huge concern for the way in which young women behave in relationship to alcohol. While I am one of the first to stand up and say that women have the right to be safe (and have in fact spent many years working in that area), with rights come responsibilities.

It is a woman’s responsibility to make sure she is able to make decisions for herself. That is virtually impossible when she is so drunk that she is not able to stand, let alone keep herself out of danger.”