“You don’t want to be rude, you don’t want to be weird,” he said. “Definitely there’s an awkwardness to saying no.”
When his friends saw what was happening, they moved the party elsewhere, and he was left alone with a girl he didn’t know. He knew he didn’t want to have sex with her, but she was persistent and he didn’t say no.
As things heated up, he said he felt his body sent him a message: He didn’t get an erection. Even though he was uncomfortable with the situation, he was confused by his body’s behavior.
“I’m like ‘Whoa, whoa, whoa, I must be broken, this doesn’t make sense,’ ” he said. “So what I told myself, and I think it’s true, is for me it’s important that I like someone, I like their personality to an extent enough that I can become sexually attracted to them. And if I’m not at that point, then it’s not wanted.”