How To Be More Assertive At Work When That’s Just Not Your Personality. http://google.com/newsstand/s/CBIwoqf3ljY
For example, when you say to someone that you’re “kind of done” with a project, you’re not really stating that you are finished with it, just somewhere in the vicinity of done.
These linguistic habits can creep into your questions just as easily as they can water down your statements. Maybe you preface a request by saying, “I was sort of hoping that you would . . . ” hoping that this phrasing will come off more polite. Agreeable person that you are, you think your chances of getting what you want will be higher when you aren’t seen as imposing on anybody. But you might be wrong; This language makes it sound like your request isn’t all that important, or even that you’re not certain it deserves to be granted.
Just state your requests more directly. “I need . . . ” or “I want . . . ” will typically get you much further. Decision makers in your organization can’t help you unless you state clearly what you need to be successful, and explain why it’s so important. Even if they can’t grant what you want that very moment, they may be able to help you out in the future.